Gravity Response

“I am writing to take issue with your inept and bungling review of the film ‘Gravity’. To begin, during just the start of your review, you already began to overpower readers by attempting to brainwash them to ‘love this movie’ when actually, ‘the simple truth of the matter is’ that not everyone has the same unique and dreary taste as yourself. 

However, your useless attempt to indoctrinate your audience was short lived, as before your review had even started, you began rambling nonsense about films your audience have probably never heard of. At this stage, any reader would be feeling rather overwhelmed, yet before even a minor recovery could be made, you attack them again and ask them to ‘surrender’.

In addition to this, throughout your poor attempt at a review, you constantly refer to God as if he is part of the film himself. You mentioned the ‘view from God’s balcony’ as if the film was set at his house. 

When I decided to read this review, it was because I actually wanted to know about the film, not find religious inspiration. If anything your religious comments make the review slightly biased, I mean, who’s balcony are they standing on if I’m not religious?”